The other day, I was taking a study break on campus and doing my favorite study break activity: Playing Klondike Solitaire. I really like it because it moves slowely, gives me time to look around and ponder stuff without feeling like I should be doing something else, and it's just relaxing as fuck. I've been playing Klondike with a physical set of cards on and off for years now, and I always seem to come back to it at some point no matter how long a break I might have taken. I've played it enough that I've gotten pretty decent, and I got to thinking about how the lessons I learned about how to play a better game of Klondike also translate to how to live a better life. Here's what I came up with!
Sometimes, things just don't work out, and that's not your fault.
I'm reminded of this quote by Captain Picard, from Star Trek:
No, I don't watch Star Trek, but I read that qoute years ago and I haven't been able to forget it. I feel like Klondike is an apt analogy for such a concept. You go through the process of thoroughly shuffling the deck, lay them out neatly, then make the moves that present themselves, and eventually run out of any possible moves. Ah, truly, a tale as old as time (or at least as old as Klondike). As a player, you did literally nothing wrong to deserve that loss, yet it still happened. All you can do is shuffle the deck again, re-deal, and hope for better luck on the next go!
I feel that life is similar to that as well. Facing a loss or an unpleasant situation, you can analyze the actions that got you there, freak out over how you could have done different things to avoid your situation, and generally put yourself through the wringer trying to figure out what you did wrong. Honestly, sometimes that's good, it can help you grow from your mistakes, but when you DIDN'T make any mistakes, you're just wasting your time.
When you dealt yourself a losing deal, you can't possibly know that every move you make just takes you closer to a dead end. Similarly, you might have every reason to believe a decision is correct, yet after you've made the decision you may come to learn that it was folley from the start. That is not a flaw, that is simply unfortunate.
Such possibilities should not stop you from making decisions or playing Klondike! Sometimes life will knock you on your ass just for the hell of it, and all you can do is give it a good shuffle and re-deal.
Imagine this: You're playing Klondike, and you uncover the 8 of hearts. In one of your piles, there is the 7 of spades holding back 3 face down cards. In another pile there is the 7 of clubs holding back 3 face down cards.
This is a choice that could win or lose the game. There could be the 8 of diamonds under one of those 7s, and if you chose the wrong one to place under the 8 of hearts, it very well might be impossible to win, solely based on that one decision.
In keeping with number 1, it's not always your fault if a decision you made doesn't work out in the end. I suppose these go hand in hand and I already talked about a lot of the stuff that could go here in number 1, but I definitely thought it worth mentioning in it's own terms.
Sometimes you make the best decision with the information you have, then you might get more information later and learn you didn't make the best decision after all.
You're not stupid or willfully ignorant for having made that decision, you're just a person, and sometimes things just don't go right.
When playing Klondike, if you're just cruising along making move after move, at some point you'll realize you missed that 8 of clubs that could go under your lonely 9 of hearts and you can't remember for the life of you how long that's been an option, or if there was anything else you missed that could have been helpful. Playing fast might get you to the end of the game sooner, but it's also more likely that the end of the game will be a loss if you play that way. Similarly, if you play life too fast and make most decisions in the spur of the moment, chances are you'll miss something and be kicking yourself in the pants later.
When it comes to things not working out as well as the could have, this one would be your fault! And believe me, I've learned this lesson in life and Klondike plenty of times.
It's an easy trap to fall into, as if you were aware you were missing something, you wouldn't be missing it anymore!
It's important to be able to slow down and objectively look at the situation to verify you haven't forgotten anything important that might have cropped up recently.
Every skill worth having takes time to hone. For a long time, I did the middle school shuffle of just cutting the deck in two, loosening them up, then jamming them together in an approximate shuffle. Then I started to learn how to hold the edges with my thumbs to get that ruffling shuffle? I don't know what to call it, but you press your index knuckles into the middle of the halves and pull back on the closest edges with your thumbs and slowely release your thumbs to allow the two piles to overlap each other. Amazing.
Next up was the bridge. Wowee, I was TERRIBLE at the bridge. However, at a certain point, I just decided I was going to learn how to do the bridge. I just did the bridge terribly, and often failing to do it entirely, until I slowely got better and better, and now I can reliably get a solid, beautifully riffle sounding bridge every time! In the interim period in between being miserable at the bridge and where I am now, I didn't learn any tricks or techniques and I didn't watch anybody do it. I just got better through practice over time.
Doing the bridge is already a bit of a life skill, I think, but the same idea applies to any skill. Absolutely no one starts out as a prodigy. If it seems that way, you just weren't one of the lucky ones who got to see that person being terrible at the thing.
Keywords: Klondike Solitaire, Cards, Life Lessons